What emotion do you find most challenging? For me, it’s despair. I leave myself empty with despair. I used to find it hard to see any value at all in despair. Despair is not like anger—with anger I can motivate myself in constructive ways. It’s not like depression—when I depress myself I often gain valuable insights. Despair […]
Being Ok with Being You
One the greatest challenges any of us has is getting to self-acceptance. Yet, that is one of the most vital things we need to accomplish if we are to learn how to be happy. Whatever your life style, whether you are straight or gay, tall or short, male or female, round or lean, you can begin to like what you see and like who you are. You can begin to accept yourself and appreciate yourself.
Healthy self-esteem and valuing yourself is the very basis of a happy life and the foundation of successful relationships. However, before you can be okay with being you, you have some work to do.
You need to figure out who you are and what you value. You need to learn to live your own unique life, discover your purpose, and become less concerned with what other people think.
You need to recognize the skills that need developing before you can earn the life you desire. You have to make adjustments, create new boundaries and agreements with the people in your life, and take complete responsibility for yourself.
A Reology Retreat is designed to give you the tools to do this and bring you to a new understanding of yourself, so you can feel happy and relaxed in that knowledge.
Once you do the work and achieve “self-okayness” something wonderful happens. You begin to accept those around you. When you no longer question yourself and your own worth, your relationships have more value and bring more joy and fulfillment.
You will be free to be yourself. You’ll see yourself and your own choices in a new and healthier way. Your inner critic quiets down. You are more able to individuate from your parents or mates. You realize the value you bring just by being you. You accept criticism or direction with a healthier attitude because you do not have to protect yourself from yourself and your own negative views. Once you do, you will be able to accept and value your choices without insecurity, indecision and self-doubt.
The more comfortable you are with yourself the more comfortable others will be with you and the more comfortable your life will become. “I like me” is one of the most powerful realizations you can have. After that, the rest becomes much easier.
One of my talents and ways of making a living is being an editor and it’s work I love to do—I love words and working with languages. But there is another kind of editing I do that I don’t like—editing myself, holding myself back, not being fully myself. Recently, I was in New Mexico and […]
Jake and I are embracing change in 2017—big change—as we have decided to move to the Big Island of Hawaii. We spent 2+ months on the island in 2016 and upon returning to our beloved New Mexico we realized we were different. Between us, we’ve lived in New Mexico for over 75 years and yet, […]
Can love really be easy? Can relationships be easy? Or do our darker sides, our shadows, that are born out of neglect, abuse, or lack of nurturance early in life—result in us having to work hard to love and be loved? Do our early life emotional deficits—as well as rejection and failed relationships later in […]
Imagine you are walking down a dusty road between two tall hedges and carrying a heavy load. There are many others on the road. This is the road of an ordinary life. You notice that some people get ahead of you and some fall behind. You have struggled at times along this road to keep […]
Maybe one of the more painful, or even frightening things, is when we are unable to get another person—especially one we love—to hear and understand us. The person listening doesn’t necessarily even need to agree with us—if only they would listen and understand our experience. Can you hear me? Is that too much to ask? […]
Freedom is man’s capacity to take a hand in his own development. It is our capacity to mold ourselves. –Rollo May As a human being, I am a meaning maker. I’m compelled to make sense of the world around me. I do this by telling myself stories. But I’ve discovered, as I become more present, […]
“It is sometimes said that our image of reality is an illusion, but that is misleading. It may all be an appearance in the mind, but it is nonetheless real—the only reality we ever know. The illusion comes when we confuse the reality we experience with the physical reality, the thing-in-itself.” Peter Russell A […]
Would you like to live in alignment with yourself so that no matter what’s going on around you . . . you stay connected to yourself and honor yourself? If so, read on, because there is a way to live without all of the emotional ups and downs. These up and down cycles, two-steps forward […]
We can free ourselves from all forms of emotional suffering, even many forms of physical suffering, when we learn how to change the way we make meaning. But here’s the problem, talking to people about how they make meaning is like talking to fish about water. The fish say, “What water?” They are not conscious […]