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Manifesting Maow

Years of study with a Japanese Zen master gave me a strong referent experience of what it means to be here now. He was my first Zen teacher and now there’s our cat, Maow. He is the master of simple enlightenment. Maow is always in the moment. He’s completely connected to his senses, noticing all […]

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A Mindful Life

“I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living […]

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How To Be Happy: Poof

In my previous article I introduced one idea—one idea that can free me from most of my suffering. This idea is that meaning is made up. An event occurs, or someone says something to me . . . and then I make meaning of that event, or the words that were spoken. I make meaning […]

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Why Therapy Fails

Tens of millions of people go to one form of psychotherapy or another because they want: To be happier To escape their anxieties and fears To create a happy romantic partnership To find their life purpose and feel satisfied And when I look at the results I reach the conclusion that most therapy fails. It’s […]

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How to Get From There to Here

Why are you reading this blog? I started reading it two years ago because I was trying to get from there to here—”there” being stuck and “here” being happy with myself. Since attending my first Reology retreat last summer I have transformed myself. I know that sounds dramatic, but it’s the absolute truth. The teachings […]

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Being Perfect

“The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” ~ Anna Quindlen I recently returned from someone else’s 5-day workshop. I do this every year—attend a workshop—to keep myself growing and to stimulate my creativity for our own retreats. As usual, I chose […]

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Emotional Toolbox

Spring is slowly arriving in Toronto. The trees are leafing, tulips and daffodils abound and the lilacs will be here in a week. The magnolia trees are stunning and the lawns are a vivid green from the months of snow and early spring rains. It’s still cool, but I’m only wearing one layer instead of […]

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Preciousness of Life

Kyoto, Japan It is Tuesday evening in Kyoto, Japan. We have just finished conducting a Reology Retreat. In our retreats, all participants use pseudonyms, no one uses their real name. For this retreat Hannah chose the name “Yuuki”, which is the Japanese word for courage, and I chose the name “Mr. Lucky”—which in Japanese is […]

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Don’t Waste Your Life

I have a client I’ve been working with for a couple of years who recently fell off the self-help wagon and then found her way back onto it. I share this story with you because, to me, her experience is emblematic of so many people who are trying hard to make the most of their […]

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